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todays funny

 
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dawg
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Joined: 10 Oct 2006
Posts: 448
Location: Colebrook Connecticut
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2010 11:08 pm    Post subject: todays funny Reply with quote

Bob came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber.
He awoke before the Pearly Gates, where St. Peter said, 'You died in your sleep, Bob.'



Bob was stunned. 'I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!'
St. Peter said, 'I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken.'

Bob was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home...

The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking and pecking the ground.



A rooster strolled past. 'So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?'
'Not bad,' replied Bob the hen, 'but I have this strange feeling inside.
Like I'm gonna explode!'

'You're ovulating,' explained the rooster. 'Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before? '
'Never,' said Bob. 'Well, just relax and let it happen,' says the rooster.

'It's no big deal.'



He did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg!
He was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood.

He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming.



As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard.....

"BOB, wake up! You just shit the bed!"
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